Yesterday, in the post confirming I’m not a zombie yet, I said the last few weeks have had some great personal growth. This is both in my overall confidence, a noticeable change in my own body posture, tone of voice, and ability to interact and flirt with women I don’t know.
I haven’t asked for numbers yet. I know, shame on me. But when I was in the moment I was also accompanied by one of the multiple ‘bosses’, or maybe ‘overseers’ would be better, from my current project. I had the distinct impression that picking up the women I was flirting with in front of them would be a bad idea.
When I wrote the post the other day, I was frustrated with myself for not going for those numbers/hook ups, even knowing I had good reason not to. But then I was catching up on my blog reading and found this post on Overconfidence by Roissy:
Instead, as a newcomer to the game of seduction, you should be rejoicing in every positive interaction you have with women, no matter how trivial. Every hi fuels your confidence until you are prying smiles from girls. Every smile emboldens you until they are touching you. Every touch emboldens you until they are giving you their numbers. Every number emboldens you until they are kissing you. Every kiss emboldens you until you are banging them. Every bang emboldens you until you feel free to love them.
Two trivial success stories
The first was with a cute girl working the late night paint department at Home Depot. It was around 10:30 – perfect timing for the rare, non-war pig flirting at home depot. The store is closing down, there’s no one around, no distractions – except for the boss type guy that was with me to actually purchase the paint for the show I’m working on.
Anyways, I love this kind of opportunity. I get the target, all to myself, for the 10 minutes it takes to mix paint. I have ready openings and topics of discussion on hand – I’m painting a set for theatre, not some boring home addition like every other guy she gets during her day. I’d rate this girl as a 5, probably just because her teeth were bad. But she looked good bending over the counter to flirt with me.
So I open, talking about the show and displaying that yes, I’m a bad ass theatre artist that can pay his bills doing theatre. Does she do any painting, or anything else artistic, or simply regulated to the shitty job of late night paints at Home Depot? She starts talking about her house, the room she painted for her daughter, and how her daughter is now asking for a room painted like He-man in purple and green instead of carebears and castles. While that would raise a red flag for me normally, I see no reason to stop flirting in this case. I neg her choices in old 80′s cartoons, offer alternatives I would have gone with instead that are both better and more color friendly on her walls.
I don’t recall the details after that, but by the end of the conversation she was hinting that she could get out of the warehouse by 1 instead of her normal overnight and was talking about other rooms in her place – she was practically begging that I ask her for her number. Damn the ‘boss’ and having to work overnight on the show myself.
The second was a much shorter interaction, but it was more fun in how quick it was. I was out buying a used table at a warehouse where they gather and resell reclaimed and unwanted materials from home demolitions/remodels. Cool shit. Anyways, I had to ask the price for a table that was unmarked. So I look around, find the hottest girl working there, and ask her. Probably a 7 – a cute short haircut, and a figure that stands out in her working overalls – not exactly an easy thing.
Instantly when she gets out from behind the counter she pulls out her phone and wants to show me an item they just got out of an alley. A cool, hand carved boat about 2 feet long with a dozen carved figures rowing. I instantly seize the opportunity to establish physical contact, pull in close, and am able to show genuine interest because, damn, that boat was really fucking cool. And she was hot and smelled good. A pleasant mix of femininity overlaid with a subtle smell of sawdust.
Again, I use theatre as a good topic to keep discussion from lagging as we get to the table. Theatre is my bread and butter in these things. I can talk about it forever, and am good at doing so in a way that accessible to anyone and leads to other discussions. We get to the table, I lift the thing into a shopping cart they have around for that type of thing – damn I forgot the thing is made out of solid steel, but am still able to get it in and not embarrass myself. She even commented on being impressed as she didn’t think I’d be able to do it myself. Rest of the interaction is fun, joking, talking about using the shopping cart/table as a battering ram and other similar stuff. Whole thing – maybe 5-7 minutes.
I had a couple other small, quick flirts over the two weeks. But none that stood out as much as those.
One failure…. Maybe?
On Thursday of the first week of tech rehearsals, I get a FB invite to go drinking for a girl’s birthday. Having spent 4 of the last 5 nights sleeping at the theatre for a minimum amount of sleep before waking up and working more (yeah, I was that behind because I got screwed by my carpenter flaking out on me), I naturally jumped on an opportunity to unwind. Plus I was finally getting finished with the set.
Two hours, 5 or 6 drinks, and 1 bar later.
Its me, her, and one of her friends. Her friend is a 3 or 4 that dreams she’s a 6 or 7 – she certainly has the cold hearted, assertive, ‘I deserve better’, bitch thing down. Thank god she’s approaching men at the bar herself. Leaving me my friend, who at this point my drunken mind has turned into a target (she’s also a quasi-business connection in theatre, but not really? Its complicated). Anyways, she’s telling me about how after her last break up she did the ‘summer slut’ thing for awhile. Also that she’s moving back to Louisiana in 4 or 5 months because she wants to get married, settle down, and start a family. And she thinks it’ll be easier to do in her Southern hometown than in the big city.
Run hamster, run.
Anyways, not sure if she’s trying to flirt with me or not, I continue to flirt with her. She calls me out on it, saying that she knows I was flirting with all her friends as well (damn, caught. But I only see her friends once a month, if that). I immediately respond with ignorance that what I had been doing was flirting (a lie, but a plausible one. I hadn’t ever had an intention of asking digits or kissing any of them. Just practicing my game).
At this point the 6 drinks that normally would be a good tipsy all hit me at once. I belatedly realize I forgot to calculate my 3 hours of sleep a night for 5 nights and lack of eating into my drinking. Somehow I ended up walking the girl home. At her front door I go for the kiss and get it. Then, without a word, I walk away and go home. No idea how I got back – only clear memory I have is eating half a burrito and a cup of coffee on the way at a 24 hour diner.
Wake up in the morning, get to work, and consider how to play it. I normally would have put quasi-contact on the list of ‘flirtable, but carefully and NEVER EVER ENGAGE IN MORE THAN THAT’. At this point my old beta self panics, rears its head, and apologizes via text. Doh. And then new me starts to stomp that shit into the ground, continues to flirt, and offers that atleast her lesbian friend was right and that she was a good kisser. Some minor flirting via text, but then it dried up. Haven’t talked since, and I know better than to be the one that re-engages in any actual discussion
Tonight – a possible pirana frenzy
I doubt it’ll happen, but the latest show has a free preview tonight. I texted several (including the possible failure) about it – telling them about it and that I was going to see it and then go across the street to the bar afterwards. We’ll see what happens.
Anyways, overall I’m excited. Some good stuff. And the professional growth has been in line with this – I have a feeling the confidence in each was influencing and building upon the other. I’ll do a separate post for that later this weekend after I have time to edit photos.
Instead, as a newcomer to the game of seduction, you should be rejoicing in every positive interaction you have with women, no matter how trivial. Every hi fuels your confidence until you are prying smiles from girls. Every smile emboldens you until they are touching you. Every touch emboldens you until they are giving you their numbers. Every number emboldens you until they are kissing you. Every kiss emboldens you until you are banging them. Every bang emboldens you until you feel free to love them.
Right on dude. It’s not failure, it’s just practice for success. I would go further with the 7 in the store and watch your alcohol intake. It’s easy to get pretty drunk if you don’t pace yourself.
Yeah. I gotta get back to that store. It’s a fun place to dig around for cool old shit. You can easily find stuff from the 40′s that is cool and still works. Add a 7 to it and it’s a blast.
And yeah. Gotta be more careful with the alcohol when I’m sleep deprived. Its been a long time since I was so tired that I forgot how much it affects what I can drink and how quickly.